These are just a few of my favorite bits of Republican misfortune this year. I'm sure you can think of more.
VA-Sen: A seat your party holds in a purple-trending state somewhat unexpectedly opens up. The good news is that you have an ideal successor, ready-to-go. He's won hard-fought elections, cultivated a "moderate" record, and has tons of cash in the bank. What do you do? Well, obviously, if you are the modern Republican Party, you tell him to fuck off. Congrats and thanks to the VA GOP for running Tom Davis out of town by cancelling their primary and scheduling a wingnut festival instead.
NY-19: The gall! The unmitigated gall! How could a Democrat ever dare to represent Westchester! Why, such things just aren't done! Well, of course they are (after all, a Dem represents the 18th), but so said the NY GOP after 2006. So they set their sights on Rep. John Hall and rallied around uber-rich self-funder Andrew Saul. Only problem: After months of gangbusters fundraising, it turns out Saul's up to his ears in ethics violations - and now out of the race. A Republican engaging in corruption? Why, such things just aren't done!
NJ-07: Here's a job no Republican wants: food-taster for Markos Moulitsas. Here's another job no Republican wants, either: United States Representative for New Jersey's Seventh Congressional District. Within just a single day of this seat opening up, Tom Kean, Jr., Jon Bramnick and Bob Franks all took a pass. Three up, three down, end of the inning. Better luck in the next frame, compadres.
OH-15: First there was Jim Petro. But Petro said no. Then there was Steve Stivers. But Stivers said no. Then there was Jim Hughes, but Jim Hughes said no. Then there was Greg Lashutka but Lashutka said no. Then, there was... three months of silence. And finally, Steve Stivers decided he was fer it after he was agin' it, undoubtedly after Tom Cole twisted his arm 180 degrees behind his back. Hint to Republicans: Money won't spring loose if you shove it the full 360. Nor will victory.
CT-02: The NRCC called him a "heavyweight." Thing is, Mike Tyson is also a heavyweight. No, Sean Sullivan doesn't sport any facial tattoos, but he might as well be wearing a scarlet letter, given how unloved he is these days in DC. "Persona non grata," declared one insider after Sully scraped together a miserable $25K in the second quarter. Personally, I prefer another Latin phrase: bigus dickus. Good luck, skipper.
Crumb-bums will be crumb-bums; they can't help it - it's just in their nature.